I know. If you guys don’t follow me on Instagram or Facebook, this might shock you. Like a lot. A few weeks ago I was done. I realized my anxiety and depression had really seeped into every facet of my life. I don’t talk about it a lot on here, but I’ve always been an anxious person… I didn’t realize this until a few years ago, but it’s always been there. Social situations, everyday activities, every day. Anxious thoughts, scared, and most of the time it makes it harder for me to do things, but I dealt with it & my creativity blossomed I believe because of it. Throughout our fertility journey that’s when my anxiety allowed depression to sneak in & I didn’t notice until I hit a really big low. After 7 years of infertility & 7 babies lost it was bound to happen. I will talk more about that later in a fuller fertility update and where we are at, but for now… it’s weird and hard to admit it, but I suffer some pretty big lows & I’ve noticed that it snuck into many areas of my life, even our decor, & I was done with it.
One day Jose and I went into Pottery Barn & I spotted this peachy velvet pillow with a floral pattern on it & it lit something inside of me that I hadn’t felt in a while… inspiration. I was feeling inspired & it made me full of joy. So I went crazy gathering up velvet pillows, vases, candles, & finally I picked up the curtains I had been eyeing for a very long time. It was all to bring life to our front living room. I was so excited to get home and put it all in the space that we got home at 9 at night & sat ripping open packages & tearing the room apart to put all the new items in the space… it was the BEST therapy that I’ve ever had. It’s the thing that I love & the thing that I wasn’t feeling inspired to do for so long because of the low I had been in. If you have ever experienced a low often times you don’t see the low that you were in until you are coming out of it.
It’s hard to explain, but I think in my depression & anxiety I had stripped away everything in my life & the color out of our house. I’m not saying that white decor isn’t something that I love or want to keep in our house because let’s face it I’m sure white decor will always be a first love, but with pops of life like blues, greens, & other lovely colors that I love. When I was depressed there was no desire to experiment or to add in anything new or fresh. It’s hard to find motivation or inspiration when you are in in a low, but I highly suggest finding things that spark inspiration so that you can do that at your lowest moments to lift your spirits. It’s easier said than done, but totally possible. I don’t always go into Pottery Barn and spend money to feel inspired, but this time that one pillow got me in a lot of trouble, but made our front living room a happy place to be.
Now, for a weird twist of events. We are working on our back guest bedroom in our home & I’m debating on putting these curtains & pillows in that room in the back of the house. Or maybe I’ll keep them here. Or maybe I’ll move them to the guest bedroom & then move them back here. Who knows. I know, I know, I’m always changing things… but one thing I don’t change is always changing something.. so that counts for something right? no? Ok. Well, it’s all up here for now and I love it. I’ll update you all later if we decide to switch anything. I can’t help when I’m hit by the inspiration bug & I feel inspired to do all of this [including more from this room] in the guest bedroom. I hope you guys like these new pops of color in our front living room & I hope you understand some of my jumbled thoughts on all of my feelings and inspiration lately. Thank you guys so much for stopping by the blog today & for supporting me in my highs and my lows. xx
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I love the living room. I hope you keep it as is. I have those colors in my house and they always make me happy.
Tuned into your blog and was I surprised! Your living room is almost identical in layout as mine. My sofa is closer to the fireplace and the two chairs flank my fireplace. I, too, have an antique wardrobe in the exact same location and a dry sink backing up my sofa. However, my color scheme is a complete opposite with pumpkin and turquoise as the dominant colors and plenty of wood backed up to a creamy white background. Our curtains are almost the same! Great minds think alike!
Oh SNAP! Shaking things up! I love it….completely and totally loving it!
It’s crazy how some simple hits of colour & pattern can completely change the mood of a room – loving it 🙂
Is your sofa in this room fromIjea?
My favorite room, love the pops of color. Get more for other rooms leave these. I understand your pain and color helps the sole. White main pieces and adding a little color makes it look alive. I was in Waco same time as you. Love your blog and your home.
It’s so interesting you talk about depression/anxiety stripping the color out of your house. I’ve experienced the same thing, except I use a lot of black (and white and wood) without even realizing it. Recently I’ve been starting to bring in a lot of green and I can just feel the house bloom. I’ve had three pregnancies (and two miscarriages) and after each, I’ve suffered from postpartum depression and anxiety. The irrational fears and intrusive thoughts are the worst. Thank you for continuing to share your lovely home and journey with us readers.
Oh, let the color rest in that room for a while because it looks beautiful! Soft bits of color that work with your style:) I am sorry you are often anxious:/ It’s hard when one’s joy is stolen by that. May God bless you today with some peace.
I think it’s gorgeous. I love looking at white rooms, but I could never live with them. You brought in just the perfect amount of color. Maybe in your bedroom (your white bedroom) you could bring in soft blues, greens, grays and even a squirt of mustard yellow. Very soft and soothing and giving you a nest to curl up in when you feel too much stress. I think we all need a little shot of color. This room is just beautiful.
Looks beautiful!!!
Liz, it looks beautiful. Hang in there and know that you are not alone. Depression and anxiety are a terrible thing. Sometimes we look so together on the outside that no one can imagine our internal struggles. We are fighters. Keep fighting the fight. Hugs. ❤️
Your descriptions of feeling low and anxious are so true…….Making your home space how you want it certainly helps with those feelings.
LOVE the soft colors in the room! It just took it to the next level plus if it makes you smile when you walk in that’s the best therapy you can have. Struggling with anxiety and depression sucks but you recognize it and that is half the battle. Best thing you can do when you start to feel it coming on is take a walk around your beautiful property, get some fresh air and breath deep. Look at the beauty around you that God has provided for you to enjoy. Feel his presence embracing you and hopefully peace will fill your soul.
The soft color looks beautiful in your lovely room, so now every time you look inside, it can be your “happy” place.
It’s beautiful the colours are soft just like the white., now all you need to do is put something on those bookcases❤️
My favorite form of “therapy” is to throw myself in to my home; moving furniture, deep-cleaning, reorganizing. So I completely understand your joy in a simple pillow turning your internal pain around. Two miscarriages here, and I also suffer from anxiety and depression. Thank you for sharing; it helps make the rest of us feel we have a special friend in you. Your home is progressing into such a warm, lovely place to live. And a huge congrats on the Country Living appearance!
Gorgeous! beautiful soft colours, but just the pop you need in that room. Love a white scheme, but even with a lot of texture sometimes it all blends together. These colours give your eyes places to move to. LOVE. You should leave it for a bit, without moving. It can be your happy place.
S
Love your Blog and your home Liz! Your house is amazing! Thank you for sharing about your personal struggle with anxiety/depression. I have as well, and I could not agree more with your statement that you don’t really know how low you are or that you’re in a low until you start to come out of it. Thank you! Keep going onward and upward, and I love the new pops of color!
I’ve suffered from depression and anxiety since I was a teenager. I really understand. When I’m down or anxious I have a need to get rid of things, too much stuff adds to my anxiety. The bad thing is, I’ve gotten rid of things that I later regret! Color to me usually looks like chaos to my brain, so white and nuetrals calm me. It’s hard for me to see your big old farmhouse and not be envious, but the beauty overcomes the envy (most of the time).
Hey Liz,
Somehow I think it fits with your cows. I wonder if this is a sign that you are really settling into farm life… they say settling in takes two years…
really beautiful. Cannot wait to see more!
The color you have added really does warm up your space and gives your eye some place to land. Looks really cozy now, love the drapes too!
I am older and I think all white looks pretty in a photo, but color in a room makes it come alive and brings emotion with it!
I pray that you will sense God’s loving presence with you every day, moment by moment. He knows where and when you hurt, and He will care for you and comfort you in His embrace.
Love to you, Jeanne Marie
Like you, I love all things neutral. But then there are those moments in time when something captures you and it fills you up with new inspiration and make the change in your home so exciting and refreshing! I love your room and the colors! I’m so happy the despair is lifting. His mercies are new every morning! Shine brightly!
Liz, I cried as I read your post tonight. I cried because I brought my 13 year old son to the doctor this morning for the same thing, anxiety. I cried as I explained to the doctor how I’ve seen him change in the last year due to his anxiety. I also cried as I read your post because I struggled with infertility and loss and I know the pain so deeply. It is not something you ever get over, but you get through. You are such an inspiration to so many! Keep sharing your heart and your journey, sweet girl! Prayers going up for you! xo
I suffer from anxiety as well. And like you, I didn’t realize what it was until a couple years ago. So thankful , Jesus is there to pull us through!
Thank you so much for your kind words Melinda – Liz Marie <3
Your home has come to life! It’s like it’s smiling!! Looks so lovely!!! I used to teach Sunday School to preschoolers. I always wondered how I could get God’s message across to them as they were so young & didn’t really seem to grasp why they were there or what was being said. So I got in the habit of telling them two things every Sunday right before they departed. I would say, “Remember Jesus loves you & He walks w/you always!” I continued to teach through the years & my husband joined me during the Confirmation years w/our two kids & I continued to tell all the kids that into their teens. There are many days I have to remind myself of that message too! God has a plan for you & your husband. It’s hard to be patient, I know, but He will reveal it to you in His time. Sending prayers up for you. God Bless-
I love the touch of color. Very pretty. By the way I love your blog and have visited the shop while I was at a bed and breakfast over in Michigan. with my husband. Cutest shop ever! My best friend is dealing with Infertility and I can’t imagine what you must of gone through. Keeping you and Jose in my thoughts and prayers. Xoxo
Liz, this is absolutely beautiful! I love the touches of soft color. It adds so much visually, and most importantly, I’m so glad it inspires you and makes you happy. It’s amazing what color can do! Hugs! Ps. Will I see you at Haven this year?
The added color is BEAUTIFUL!!! Really makes the room pop! Love it friend!!!
I always love all you do so I love the new room with the pop of color. You are so talented truly. I struggle with the lows of depression but certainly cannot imagine the losses you have been through and I am so very sorry. You will be in my prayers.
Love the new room. And those lamps, I wanted to crawl through the screen to grab them! I’m off on Monday, so headed to PB to see if they have them in store…
Just keep doing whatever you have to do to keep going. That’s all. Just keep going..
Liz, your living room is gorgeous. I understand the anxiety thing and not having motivation or feeling inspired. I struggle with it too. I’ll keep you in my prayers, friend!
It’s so refreshing to see color in a farmhouse! This is coming from someone who has tried the light, muted colors that are almost always associated with farmhouse style. Like you I had to add some color, and like you, I also deal with so many of the same things you have experienced in life. For me color is life, and I can’t image “back in the day” that everyone’s farmhouse was always completely white. Your home is gorgeous whatever you do!
I don’t know how you feel about “advice?” Some people hate it…some folks love it (I love it myself) … anyway I’ll take the risk to ask; have you had a full thyroid panel tested by a Functional Medicine Physician (FMP)? I have thyroid issues myself (Hashimotos’ thryiditis) so I know a little bit about it. Anxiety and depression go hand in hand with thyroid issues as does infertility. I may be going out on a limb here (and please forgive me if this is unwanted advice) but I too live in SW Michigan in Allegan County and I have found the BEST FMP in Grandville. She is a hormone expert as well as thyroid specialists. She has given me my life back. Sometimes I just get these “intuitive” feelings and I have learned to not ignore them. I only send this in tthe name of peace and in healing. Donna Allgaier-Lamberti/SmallHouse Big Sky Homestead.
Natural Health Improvement Center PC Master
Dr. Ann M. Auburn, DO/MD
4466 Heritage Ct. SW Unit D, Grandville, MI 49418
PHONE: 616-301-0808 FAX: 616-301-7887
Practicing integrative functional medicine.
INTEGRATIVE APPROACH
I think the addition of color has made this room so pretty! I’ve followed your blog for a long time, as well as on Instagram, but I’ve only commented maybe once or twice. Yay for color! While the white on white on white is ok, it’s never been my thing. I’m very sorry to hear that you’ve been feeling low, which is perfectly understandable! Thank God that we have Him to rely on, although He knows our sorrows and pain and understands. I’m so glad that you’re getting out of your funk now and bringing life into your home. It’s going to radiate into other areas of your life as well.
Loving your gorgeous color addition…just beautiful!
The room looks very nice. I agree absolutely with an area rug to tie the dwelling location together–however no vivid color! The beige factor is running well, and also you have to stay with it. So many human beings in this website are underneath the sad misconception that every room needs vibrant color.
Personally, the position of the sofa–with one quit in opposition to the wall–would drive me insane. I’d placed the couch in opposition to the wall and area the two chairs facing it (at slight angles). I’d additionally try to cast off the digital stuff or something this is to the left of the fireplace–do not block the great little windows.
You are so creative. Thanks for sharing Your Post.